Treat Your Best Friend Like The Love Of Your Life (Because She Is)
Because friends are forever, and boys are whatever.
getty Typically, as adults, we put the majority of our emotional energy into whoever it is we’re sleeping with or would someday like to sleep with. Between daydreaming, planning what we’ll wear when we casually run into them, and stalking their Instagram feed, these people take up a lot of time.
Time that could be better spent somewhere else. No, not on yourself — even though a little bit of that is necessary to maintain your sanity — but on your best friends.
Too often we keep our friends around as a source of entertainment. Our time together is spent mainly drunk at bars where we’re claiming to have a fun night out, but we’re all really just looking for someone to hook up with.
It’s an easy pattern to fall into, but one that can make you miss a huge opportunity to bring a lot of awesome, platonic (except for the occasional intoxicated peck) love into your life.
Friends can bring you so much joy that it’s stupid. They can open you up to just as many experiences and opportunities as a romantic relationship can. They can support you, uplift you and be there for you — without the pressure of staying together forever or breaking up.
That’s what makes friendships so easy and fun: there isn’t a huge label keeping you together. You don’t have to constantly update your Facebook with a photo of your friends for people to still think you're friends.
Friends require a lot less work to keep around — but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t put some work in.
We put so much pressure on our romantic relationships because it’s the only place we feel like we can get really close with someone. We think it’s the only way to feel loved and wanted and like someone always has our back.
But you can have that without a relationship. You can have that with your friends.
So instead of spending a lot of time worrying about what present you’re going to get the guy you like for his birthday, why not throw your friend a party? Or, instead of surprising your boyfriend with a bunch of romantic stuff (that he probably doesn’t care about as much as you do), why not surprise your friend with coffee from her favorite place?
The more effort you put into other people (especially people who actually care about you), the happier you’ll feel. Trust me.
Emily Blackwood is a writer and editor living in California.