50 Comebacks Will Leave Them SPEECHLESS (& And Make YOU Laugh)

Give it to 'em GOOD.

Funny Quotes Sassy Quotes Comebacks
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When you're not feeling up to hearing other peoples' stupidity, their voices can be unbearable. You've had a long day and you REALLY, just want everyone to go away. Immediately.

It's only human nature. Sometimes, you've just had enough and everyone and everything needs to leave your immediate vicinity before you GO OFF. But before you go off, remember: some people are IDIOTS. These people aren't worth your time, and honestly, there's no point in getting worked up over someone else's situational inadequacy.

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For these situations, you just need one thing: a one-liner. Put them in their place and flip your (metaphorical) weave while you find your happy place. 

So for all the times that they get on your nerves, here's a few quick clap backs to shut them down and stop them in their tracks. These one-liners will be all the ammunition you need to assert yourself and your point. Just make sure you practice your confident walk away strut to be the icing on the cake afterwards. 

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If you're searching for the best quotes and memes to share with the people you love (or just want to feel inspired yourself) ... look no further! From the sweetest love quotesinspirational sayings, and hilarious friendship truths, we've got you covered.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

"Roses are red, violets are blue, i've got five fingers and the middle one's for you."

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

Can you see the "fuck you" in my smile?

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I don't have the energy to pretend to like you today.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I guess those enlargement pills are working because you're twice the dick you were yesterday.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I'd agree with you but then we'd both be wrong.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

Is your ass jealous of all that shit coming out of your mouth?

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

The jerk store called. They're running out of you.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

There are two sides to every story, but you're a douche in both of them.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

No, No. Please keep your stupid to yourself.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I've seen people like you before, but I had to pay admission.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

Being a dick won't make yours any bigger.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

If only closed minds came with closed mouths.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

oh, I'm sorry. Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

The trash get's picked up tomorrow. Be ready.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

Goest & fucketh thyself.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I love the sound you make when you SHUT UP.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

Too bad you can't photoshop an ugly personality.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I wish more people were fluent in silence.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

Hey trainwreck, this isn't your station.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I've found puddles deeper than you.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

Some people think they are champagne in a tall glass, when actually they are more like lukewarm piss in a plastic cup.

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Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I've met some pricks in my time, but you, my friend, are the fucking cactus.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

If you ran like your mouth, you'd be in good shape.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

No, i checked my receipt. I didn't buy any of your bullshit.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults LOLVirgin

"B*tch please, I can remove 90% ofo your 'beauty' with a wet kleenex."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults ImgFave

"There's no need to repeat yourself. I ignored you just fine the first time."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults SomeECards

"If you don't shut your mouth, the next thing to come out of it will be your teeth."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults SomeECards

"You sir, are the human version of period cramps."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults MuchPics

"If I wanted to kill myself, I'd climb up your ego and jump down to your IQ level."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults DumpADay

"I'm not saying I hate you, what I'm saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults Chuck's-Fun

"Sorry dear, in order for you to insult me, I must first value your opinion. Nice try though."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults Chuck's-Fun

"I don't regret burning my bridges. I regret that some people weren't on those bridges when I burnt them."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults WackyButtons

"Shock me. Say something intelligent."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults PinImg

"No I'm not insulting you. I'm describing you."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults Teen.com

"I'd slap you, but that would be animal abuse." —Ariana Grande

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults Teenager-Posts

"Dear haters, I couldn't help but notice that 'Awesome' ends with me and 'Ugly' starts with U."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

If you show me you don't give a fuck. I'll show you that I'm better at it.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I hope you step on a lego.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults

I would slap you but shit splatters.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults DumpADay

"Sure, you're street smart. Sesame street smart."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults PinIMG

"I'm not an astronomer, but I'm pretty sure that the earth revolves around the sun and not you."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults ImgFave

"Zombies eat brain. You're safe."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults The Berry

Person: You're ugly.

Me: Good. I was trying to look like you today.

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults Pinterest

"The only way you'll get laid is to crawl up a chicken and WAIT."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults LOLSoTrue

"Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you'll find a brain back there."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults Netai.net

"I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew."

Sassy Quotes Comebacks Insults Weebly

"Roses are red. Violets are blue. Faces like yours belong in a zoo. Don't be mad, I'll be there too. Not in a cage. But laughing at you."