We Asked Real Men To Confess Their Darkest Sex Fantasies And YEESH

Ever wondered about a guy's weirdest fantasy? WONDER NO LONGER.

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No matter how good our sex lives are, we all have sexual fantasies that we keep under our hats just in case we need to get the job done.

These sex fantasies can change over time. When I was a tween (well before I was ready for sex) I wanted to sword fight Mel Gibson and then have him make me his young apprentice with whom he also had sex with. Clearly that one isn't a go to these days. 

If you think your sex fantasy makes you a weirdo, we've got the cure. We asked real men to share their fantasies with us, proving there is no such things as too weird, strange, dark, or icky in the world of sexual fantasies. 

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What was your first sexual fantasy?

  • Anyone else reminded of Risky Business? "Having a beautiful woman keep me home from school (high school) to have sex all day, (and this part is weirdly specific and i have no idea where it comes from) starting with doing it on the stairs."
     
  • A classic. "Kissing my elementary school teacher."
     
  • Tell us no lies. "Wonder Woman and her lasso."
     
  • "A very pale-skinned, dark-haired, blue-eyed woman. I made up this person and focused on her for a while in my fantasies. Given my coloring, I suspect it was early narcissism."
     
  • THIS MADE MY LIFE. "I remember reading The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle by Avi. I had dreams of kissing, Charlotte Doyle and of eventually marrying her. I was 11. I think the picture on the cover is the first image I ever masturbated to." 

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  • That escalated. "Jeez, what counts? Holding hands with Becky in the first grade made me feel all tingly and after that I always wanted to do that more. Or maybe when I started wanting to go down on my babysitter at age 10."
     
  • "I'm not sure, but probably a fairly simple one about seeing a neighbor girl's vagina (I was probably 6 or 7 at the time)."
     
  • Just the right amount of magical powers. "Freezing time and taking people's clothes off (I was maybe 10 years old?)"
     
  • I've always been a DC girl myself, but to each their own! "Psylocke from the X-Men. In a bathing suit."
     
  • How Looney Tunes! "The first ones I (barely) remember, long before I knew what 'sex' was, involved mild sadism and butts. (Spankings, poking with a pin/tack as seen in cartoons)."
     
  • Just wait until they make a Magic game that's as popular as Pokemon Go"Something involving being an on-stage magician and rings and making the art of Fire Elemental (MTG card) appear and disappear."

What is the "strangest" sexual fantasy you have ever had?

  • There's zero shame in that game. "I'm pretty vanilla. Probably some light BD and/or a threesome."
     
  • "To be kidnapped for sexual pleasure, probably."
     
  • Teacher's pet. "My geometry teacher. She was pretty handsy with me. I really would've liked it if she had gone further."
     
  • "Keeping someone for a weekend (with their consent) and feeding her only on cum and water." Hot.
     
  • "My now wife (then-fiance) being gang-banged at a bachelorette party where there were strippers (the bachelorette party actually happened, but I don't think the gang-banging did)."
     
  • "I'm pretty interested in fetish behavior of all sorts as long as it doesn't involve scat, so 'strange' is pretty hard to define. The only fantasies that have ever disturbed me are rape fantasies because of the harmful rather than loving nature of the involved acts."
     
  • Very Game Of Thrones. "Probably various incest fantasies that have popped up in my head from time to time."

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Bustle
 

  • Helloooo, Nurse! "Taking a routine doctor's examination too far."
     
  • "I once wished the woman i was trying to date/falling for would let me watch her do pull ups. I joked about it with my friends, but i was totally sincere. She was beautiful the way Ripley or Sarah Connor are beautiful. If she'd offered to threaten me with a shotgun, i would have accepted." 
     
  • "I woke up from a really intense dream where my friend was making me eat her ass."
     
  • "I don't usually go too nuts in the fantasy department when I'm just plain imagining. Usually it's just sex with some real person I would like to have sex with. I enjoy consuming and producing (drawing/writing, mostly drawing) *media* involving somewhat weird sex fantasies (girls & monsters, sex with girls who *are* monsters, fantasy/sci-fi stuff, with varying degrees of bondage and dubious consent), but left to just my imagination I usually get the job done with plain ol' sexy sex with real (but unavailable) people."
     
  • "Making elaborate spider webs of ropes and knots with which I would catch anthropomorphized bug people."
     
  •  "A werewolf smothering me with a prehensile dick." Team Jacob, I guess?

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It's official. There's no such thing as a "weird" sexual fantasy in this weird and wonderful world.

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