Love, Heartbreak

So, He Cheated. Can You Really Trust Him Again?

After your partner has cheating in a relationship it is reasonable to develop trust issues. Your partners past infidelity will constantly be in the back of your mind and cause you to think they are doing something wrong all the time. Whenever you two aren’t together you will probably believe they are cheating again.
In this video, licensed psychotherapist, author and YourTango Expert Dr. Tammy Nelson addresses this very issue. The trick, she says, is learning to trust your own instincts about whether or not someone is telling you the truth. "A betrayal can throw off your whole sense of what's right or wrong in the world," Dr. Tammy explains. Therefore, you'll need to focus on trusting yourself if you ever want to trust your partner — or anyone else again. Trust is the most important thing in a relationship. Without trusting you will be involved in an endless cycle of pointless and troublesome relationships.
In Dr. Tammy's new book The New Monogamy: Redefining Your Relationship After Infidelity, she offers practical advice for how you can learn to trust your own intuition again after your partner has had an affair. Check out the video above for more of what Dr. Tammy has to say!

TRANSCRIPT:

Hi I’m Dr. Tammy Nelson with Ask an Expert here to answer your sex and intimacy questions.  And today’s question is: Dear Tammy, my husband had an affair.  Can I ever learn to trust him again?

And trust is not about learning to trust your partner after they’ve cheated.  Trust is about learning to trust your own intuition, your own gut instinct about whether or not someone’s telling you the truth.  Even your partner.  Betrayal can throw off your whole sense of what’s right or wrong in the world and learning to trust your own intuition, your own sense of what’s real and what’s true is the most important thing that you need to learn to trust after an affair.  Learn to trust your own intuition, your own gut instinct, and find out more about how to do that in my new book “The New Monogamy: Redefining Your Relationship After Infidelity” or find out more information at drtammynelson.com.

Connect with me at YourTango.com/Experts/DrTammyNelson.