Surprisingly, it's not infidelity. People are just falling out of love.
By Stephanie Castillo — Written on Sep 14, 2011
Earlier this year, our friends at The Stir reported a study that concluded couples were divorcing less because of infidelity and more because they were falling out of love. Now, there's another study out of the U.K. that says the exact same thing; that divorcing couples have simply grown apart. Most Couples Are Getting Divorced Because Of This Sad Reason, Study Says
According to the 2011 U.K. survey, the number-one reason couples divorce is that they fall out of love, bumping extramarital affairs from its long-standing (eight years to be exact) number-one spot. Reasons for divorce after falling out of love, as found by consultancy firm Grant Thornton UK LLP, were extramarital affairs, unreasonable behavior, midlife crises and emotional/physical abuse.
Researchers questioned 101 leading family lawyers and found, as reported by The Telegraph, a "sharp rise in pre-nuptial agreements, and evidence that many couples had merely delayed divorce in the recession, hoping for larger settlements once the economy had recovered." 10 Signs A Woman Is Cheating: Do They Ring True To You?
Essentially, the survey has found that couples are more willing to work through a partner's sexual indiscretions than they are through a dry, loveless relationship. And who can blame them?
Louisa Plum, an associate director with Grant Thornton, said the movement in the reasons for divorce is interesting and certainly difficult to explain, and "it may be that this is starting to have an effect on the behaviour of couples affected by extramarital affairs, with more marriages than before surviving a bout of infidelity."
Couples counselor Christine Northam said it was common for couples to say they loved each other but were no longer "in love," and growing apart is a common trap in modern relationships.
"What's normally the case is that their relationship has slid down their list of priorities, replaced by the pressures of work, money worries or raising a family," Northam said. "Relationships need attention and time to nurture otherwise couples can easily drift apart."
Admittedly, regardless of the reason, divorce is not something any couple anticipates and it hurts all the same. However, we are happy to see that couples are fighting more and more for their relationships rather than just giving up at the first sign of trouble.
What types of obstacles have you had to overcome in your relationship?
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