Community: What Your Drink Says About You

tray of alcoholic beverages
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Do you ever get mixed signals from that lady that you're interested in? You might be able to get a better picture of her not by what she says in front of a crowd, but by what she drinks.

I'm not a bartender anymore, but once upon a time when I wanted to live on my own and my pipe dreams of marrying Alex Rodriguez (back when he played for the Seattle Mariners) weren't coming true, I decided that I could make enough money pouring drinks. Needless to say I was around many types of chicks, dudes and alcoholics. I've served many a things from tap to blender at all hours of the day, so here's my read on what your girl is like when she drinks:

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Beer
She's accommodating, a lady that doesn't want to bother being too different or difficult. It is very rare that a woman actually likes the taste of light beer (the man's casual drink), so when she asks for something simple like beer, it's more of a social move. She really enjoys having decent friends of both genders. Even though she's aware that a few men will want more, she still enjoys the attention.

Chasing a girl who drinks beer means that you might very well have some competition and you cannot take it too personally when she turns her attention to the crowd or other men.

Stout or Ale
She's friendly and down to earth. These women love hanging out at bars simply to just hang. Women who drink stout know that one or two glasses of stout or ale will fill her up in no time. This means that she will really have no desire to drink over her limit. She feels happy just hang out and relax.

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Don't fall in love with this girl too fast. These girls can be beautiful and therefore look like the perfect catch. What your seeing is her insatiable practical side which could very well include you as her perfect friend.

Wine Cooler or Malt Beverage
There are two ways to drink wine. Like a proud teetotaler or a like Wina.

The teetotaler is the girl who doesn't want to drink too much, but still wants to look like she's drinking. She complains about the "horrible taste of beer" and coughs when she (rarely) takes a shot. She is concerned about appearances but often fails (Not always. No offense, if you know one.) at actually looking cool in any bar.

This girl might just be better off left with her friends, since those who are the people who will support her idea of trying to hang. You might be able to approach her, but I'm not entirely sure what your success rate will be. Maybe if you buy her another glass of wine, she might loosen up enough to give you a second look.

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On the other hand, your Winas are comfortable in their environment. These women can be regular customers at a bar and/or drink regularly at home. Unfortunately, you would have to frequent the same place repeatedly or be invited to her home to really get to know this lady.  That, my friend, is all up to you and your charming personality.

Blended
These are usually the women who enjoy describing things and chatting about details. They enjoy reading the menu and get enticed by the cleaver adjectives used to describe all of the ingredients of the drink. Even though the juices and mixes are usually something you pick up at a Wal-mart, she enjoys the novelty of these drinks.

Everyone knows that the detail oriented woman is both a curse and a blessing. For lack of certification in sociology, I'm going to try to narrow this one down to one word…expensive. Not that all women who drink blended things love to hear the credit card receipt print out, but it's just that blended drinks are, in fact, expensive. Just as many things tall, colorful and generally pleasing to the eye, buying too many of these can get pretty costly.

So, I guess the question lies within the parameter of whether she's buying the drinks herself or having somebody else pay for them. Keep in mind that one or two of these drinks doesn't count. I'm talking about drinking, not sipping, after all. Us girls just like to be girly sometime, but you might want keep your eye out for that women who doesn't like to settle for anything less than perfect. You're probably going to love or hate her. Or both, which gets complicated. Your call.

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Rocks
These women are straight forward and like their men like they do their drinks. Let me think…simple with an edge, not watered down, tasteful yet potent enough to keep her coming back for more. Basically, a drink (man) that does the job right.

Depending on your personality, your either going to make it or break it point blank. It's sort of scary, but at least she knows what she wants. This could save a lot of time, but also put you to work very quickly, so buck up buddy. The women is essentially saying, "Show me what you've got and I'll let you know what the real deal is, because I'm really into productivity and right now it's getting intoxicated." This "make me an offer I can't refuse" kind of girl might or might not be the one for you, be careful.

What have you encountered at the bar by conversation with women and what they drink?

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Does this list give you more confidence or more doubt in women?