Teacher Tells Parent Her Teacher Appreciation Gift Belongs In The Trash — ‘My First Choice Would Have Been Gift Cards’
"What a way to break a child's heart."
nikkytok / Shutterstock After a mother dropped off a gift to her daughter’s teacher to demonstrate her appreciation, she never could have imagined the ungracious response she would receive from the teacher.
Despite the mother spending an entire night putting together the teacher’s gift, the teacher claimed that she was “not a fan” and that she would likely throw it in the trash if the mother didn’t take it back.
The teacher told the mother that she did not appreciate her gift of baked goods because she did not like ‘sugary foods.’
In an uncomfortable text message exchange between the mother and teacher, the mother, Molly, reached out, asking how the teacher, Ms. Kim, was doing and if her daughter dropped off the gift they made together for her.
“When I dropped Sofie off this morning, you weren’t there yet,” Molly wrote. “I left you a basket of cookies and muffins. I wanted to be sure you got it.”
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When Ms. Kim replied that she did, in fact, receive the basket and asked what it was for, Molly said it was a gift of appreciation for the kindness she had shown her daughter over the last few months.
“We were baking almost all night. I didn’t get off till late last night. Hope you enjoy them!” she wrote. “The least we could do was bake you something special.”
When Molly expressed her worries that the students may have eaten some of the treats before Ms. Kim discovered them, she wrote, “Unfortunately, they didn’t.”
The teacher said that she would likely be throwing the gift in the trash.
“I really don’t eat cookies and muffins. I’d say I appreciate them, but I am not a fan of baked, sugary foods,” Ms. Kim wrote. “I can hand you the basket at pick-up. This is because the only other option would be to throw them in the trash.”
Molly apologized to the teacher, claiming that she and her daughter just wanted to surprise her and show her their gratitude. She suggested that Ms. Kim give the basket to a friend who enjoys baked goods instead.
However, the teacher ridiculed Molly for not asking her beforehand what her gift preferences were.
“If you had asked me, my first choice would have been gift cards. I would have loved some school supplies, too. We run out of those super fast,” she wrote.
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“Also, no friends of mine would want sweet, sugary stuff either, but thanks for the suggestion,” she concluded her message with an eye-rolling emoji to convey her disdain.
Molly said that she would take the basket back when she picked up her daughter from school and added that the teacher could no longer expect to receive gifts from them in the future after her cold response.
“You have been nothing but condescending and rude. Just absolutely freaking entitled. Are you okay? What a way to break a child’s heart,” she wrote back. “You have no idea what I had to put off doing last night. Wow, what an ingrate.”
Others agreed with the mother, noting that even if the teacher did not like sweets, there were other ways she could have handled the situation.
“Good gracious, just say thank you and put them in the staff lounge,” one TikTok user wrote.
Another user wrote, “A simple ‘thank you for thinking of me’ would have sufficed. Being honest doesn’t mean being hurtful.”
“Say thank you and then give it to the nighttime custodians who never get anything,” another user suggested.
We’ve all received gifts from people that we may not like or will never use. However, it is truly the thought that counts, and expressing your dissatisfaction with a gift is cruel, especially after the person took the time and effort to think of you.
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It doesn’t cost anything to say “Thank you!” and pass the gift to someone else who could use it after they have left. In fact, it takes much more energy to compose a paragraph to someone explaining why you don't appreciate their gift.
Parents already have enough on their plates. They should not have to worry about their children’s teachers’ gift preferences when they are attempting to demonstrate their appreciation toward them.
If the teacher wants gift cards, nothing is preventing her from going out and getting them for herself instead of emotionally wounding one of her students for baking her sweets.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.